Dr. Ziggy’s Swinging Paradigm: What is and What isn’t

The truths and cons about Sexuality

Join Dr. Ziggy for a monthly column about sexuality and topics of interest within the context of the Swinging Lifestyle, along with insights into relationships, psychology, culture, and other aspects of the Lifestyle — and beyond. 

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Greetings to all of you, and welcome to my first article in this forum!

I hope this is the first of many articles you will read and enjoy, and that I can be a source of practical, useful information for you. Thank you for joining me here!

However, before we engage in heavy discussions of sex, social sexual behaviours, as well as other interesting and intriguing subjects, such as what you should consider wearing for your next group/orgy party or fetish extravaganza, let me tell you about what my column is going to be all about, how I approach and present the information, and who I am.

In this space, I’ll address many topics and themes related to Sexuality in general, as well as Swinging and Open Relationships, among others. I’ll present and consider all those topics based on what I call the principle of “What is” and “What isn’t”.

But before I explain what that means, let me tell you who I am and why I’m doing this!

I am a Social Psychologist and a Sexologist (post-doctoral Academic and Researcher) and an overall inquisitor (the good kind…); although I do not often (or ever) ask questions in a harsh, aggressive way, I do demand to know what, how, where, and why of things. I’m curious about many things, and my curiosity requires that I investigate every detail of every story, social pronouncement or suggestion by asking sometimes rather uncomfortable questions while I consider the value of new ideas and possibilities; that is the type of inquisitor I am (so we’re all on the same page…).

I also have a thirst for knowledge. I am especially curious about new ideas and possibilities, although I always explore the factual information or hypotheses that support them. Although I’m always interested in new concepts and research, I have this annoying habit of asking questions, especially the ones that start with “why”, “what”, “how”, “who” to determine validity and relevance. I admit that constantly asking questions can drive people bonkers and irritate the hell out of activists and virtue seekers (I now know what Socrates must have felt throughout his lifetime…).

But what does all of this have to do with SG 101, I hear you say?… hang on, we’ll get there soon enough, and all of it will start to make sense to you. This preamble has a purpose; there is a plan behind this apparent madness…

I find that my goal is to let my readers know how I approached the topics/themes in my writings, what drives my “opinions”, concerns, or suggestions. I trust only information based on facts and trusted research grounded in the scientific method. After all, I’m a researcher.

 I attempt to dispel the myths, misinformation, and paranoid dystopias so common in information generated through social media these days. People have been trained to accept opinions as fact and believe anything proposed by clever activists. We seem to have all become Pavlov’s Dogs and salivate at the sound of the bell announcing another “hit” on the Messenger.

So, now for the question of who am I?

As I stated before, I am a Social Psychologist and Sexologist, and I would like to welcome you to my World!

But let me explain what these disciplines are all about to avoid confusion.

Psychology is not based on myth or ideology (the “what isn’t”); Psychology is a science, pure and simple! The “What is”). 

It concerns the study of the biological/neurological aspects of the human brain and its derivative processes; it evaluates how those processes affect and explain human behaviour and emotions; and it concerns itself with and categorizes the pathologies found therein. 

Psychology is not based on personal opinions, societal moralities, or the opinionated concerns of the present zeitgeist. It’s based on scientific, replicable research and evaluations.

Likewise, Sexology isn’t an ideology either (The “What isn’t”). 

Sexology is a science based on the interdisciplinary study of biology, psychology, medicine, and sociobiology, with consideration of cultural influences and their impact on human sexual behaviour. Sexology primarily includes all aspects of Human Sexuality and considers the biological/neurological and social impacts on all Homo Sapiens.

Further, it evaluates the influence of culture overall, and religious dogma specifically, on the sexual behaviour of everyone. It considers how societies define and determine the rules that govern the sexual behaviour expected from their citizens, and what is considered “deviant” and “acceptable” as a sexual behaviour. Those dogmatic expectations are “What isn’t”; they are only a judgement of what should be, based on someone else’s opinion and perspective.

Hope you’re starting to get an idea of what my “What is” and “What isn’t” is all about. 

Be careful when you refer to someone or some behaviour as “deviant”; ask yourself, “deviant” according to whom and whose rules? 

As a researcher, let me suggest to you that deviance is primarily a statistical term that indicates how far from the “mean” (or middle or average) a point is in the statistical distribution of the data set. So, the term “deviant” describes actions, ideas, or conduct that deviates (moves away) from the average of what a group or society considers normal or acceptable; that’s all. It’s a judgement call, you could say, based on opinion.

So, let me clarify: most of the information contained in the discussions you’ll find from me in this forum will be based on what we know at that moment concerning a topic or a situation, and based on the research or scientifically- based knowledge/information, and discussions thereof available at the time.

“What is” and “What isn’t” are based on the information available at the time. We may discuss opinions and hypotheses and explore how those came to be; further, we may consider, question, or discuss the role of “activism” regarding current concepts and opinions, but personally I do not subscribe to “activism” of any form; I find it clouds judgment and distorts reality.

But don’t worry, I’ll make sure the discussions or presentations here aren’t “boring” like so many of the academic and research conferences and presentations I’ve attended in the past (and continue to attend…). I’ll even manage, at times, to introduce a bit of humour, or satire, along the way (I admit, being a great admirer of Monty Python, I can acknowledge that maybe I’m not such a great stand-up comic… you be the judge of that).

And by the way, look up Monty Python, you’ll thank me for it!

But I digress; please accept my apologies….

In conclusion, this publication, SexGuide101, is meant to be a trusted source of information regarding sexuality and sexual behaviours in general, as well as a forum where discussions of all aspects of socio-sexual behaviours take place in an unbiased (and hopefully) friendly environment. One of the reasons I am excited to contribute.

I have been researching, writing, and publishing on Swinging and Open relationships since the late 80s. I’ve conducted several ground-breaking research studies on Swinging Behaviour and the impact on relationships, swinging satisfaction and self-determination, and rates of STDs/STIs among the swinging population. I’ve written chapters in books dedicated to this Lifestyle; I’ve traveled the world and visited many Swingers clubs all over, not merely North America. Thus, I acquired a global perspective on what it means to be a Swinger (and what goes on in those swinger clubs…)

I look forward to sharing what I know with the readers. Further, I welcome questions, comments, or areas of interest or concern. Please let me know what you think and how I can contribute to your knowledge base.

A quick peek next month’s article: Those Freaky Swingers. Fasten your seat belts and hang on to your hair… (for those that still have it).

I’ll leave you with a last thought: “Life is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired…”